Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
