Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
