I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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