love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Randomize
