normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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