Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
