The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize