I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
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I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
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Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
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