It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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