but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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