i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Say something about gay babies.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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