everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
