i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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