(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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