I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
