Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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