If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
