hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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