she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
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