Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
