It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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