no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
My vagina just clenched in fear
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
