Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
