Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
