Me. At least after what I've been through.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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