Nicole vs. Life
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize