Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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