This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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