Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
