i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize