So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize