Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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