is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
