i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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