I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Randomize