oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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