I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
