After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize