I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
