I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I DEMAND FORESKIN
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
