yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
