Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
