i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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