I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
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I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
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By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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