I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
