I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
