it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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