Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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