You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
It's official drugs can't kill me
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize