Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
