I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Randomize
