I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
